more car drama
Apr. 29th, 2017 10:27 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
levoiThe car drama continues. After extensive research and some visits to dealerships, I've found a car I want to buy. I convinced my dad to go see it with me and make sure all the mechanical stuff I don't know about is all in working order. As soon as we got on the lot, he totally changes his tune. He's excited and supportive; I've picked a great car that will be a good investment, as far as cars go; it'll be reliable for a long time, and though it is more than I wanted to pay, I can still put more than half down in cash. Let's do it. Talk to car guy about the money part. I can pay more than half up front, plus they'll give me $800 for my old car, which leaves me needing about $5000 and I'll be able to pay off the loan completely in three years at about $150 a month. Excellent.
They do not do their financing in house, so I have to take all the specs to my bank (across town, of course) to have them do all the loan paperwork. It is three pm Friday afternoon.
First we go to our local branch, but because it's apparently too much to ask for a bank to do bank stuff, they don't have anyone in who can help me with a loan. (I don't know why I bank here. Any time I need something more complex than a deposit, they are useless and make me go across town to use another branch. I'd leave them, but I bought so many checks...) So we drive to the other branch (across town in a different way, so now we're even further from the dealership), and of course it takes forever to get noticed by someone who can help us, because they're all talking amongst themselves like it's not four pm Friday afternoon and people have shit to do in the hour before the bank closes for the weekend.
We get back to this lady's office. She is not very nice to me; I can feel her judging me hard core. She goes over my financials, tells me my interest rate is going to be over 14% (which is huge, but I'm a delinquent, I guess, and should be punished for my lack of money by being locked into a system that charges me even more money than richer people) and then that even with her punishing me with her interest rate, she has to have my loan okayed by someone else. Look, my credit is not great. I've had some hard times, most of them health related, but I've been working on my credit the past few years, and it's actually improved quite a bit. You work hard, good things happen, right?
WRONG. We have to sit there waiting for twenty minutes while she and this mysterious moneybags decide I am too poor to deserve to better my life. She tells me I have too much student loan debt (which has been deferred since I left SCAD, a deferment that has been approved through 2018, and can simply be extended if I am still not in a position to pay it, and which may go away altogether if I meet certain disability requirements.) Just having the debt means I am too lousy to be trusted with five grand. I am so sorry that I took the trouble to go to grad school and then got really sick while paying off the ridiculously expensive price of education in this country; how hard that must be on YOU.
So I am, of course, crushed, less because I can't get the car than this is just another way I'm inhuman in the eyes of basically everyone, another way being sick is keeping me from living life, another way I'm worthless, a waste of human parts. But my dad's strangely chipper, and he's like, "Look, this is not a huge amount of money, I know you can pay it back, and we lent money to your brother and sister when they bought their cars, so we would be happy to lend you the five grand." This is, of course, amazing and very kind, but it makes me feel even worse, because they've already done so much for me and I am sure that however hard my illness and my current situation is on me, it's worse on them, so I told him I couldn't take their money.
Cut to me feeling like the most worthless creature who has worked hard and been good and mostly just been kicked in the face by it, which was definitely a depression breakdown, but was probably triggered by this whole car thing, so in the morning I tell my dad that if he's really sure they won't need the money, and if my mom is okay with it, yes, I would very much appreciate their help, and I have worked it into my budget that I can pay them back in two years. He said he was thinking of three, but okay, and he would get the money Monday (so he's borrowing from his 401k or something? I didn't ask.)
So, I figure this is settled, and I call the dealership to tell them that the bank wouldn't come through with the loan, but we would pay the whole thing in cash Monday or Tuesday. They can't hold the car, they say, without a deposit, so I give them $300 from my debit account, and it'll just be taken as part of the price when we pay for the car.
Everything's figured, I think, and it is so much stress off that I would be happy were I not a bipolar garbage fire right now.
Then, I'm driving back with my mom after running some errands with her, and she starts talking about how it's a good thing that I didn't get approved for the loan because I shouldn't touch the illegal CD they've set up for me and that I was going to crack open for my down payment (at a loss of 40¢ interest), and that I should just wait until I can afford the new car outright. So, contrary to what I'd been led to believe, my dad in no way addressed any of this with my mom nor made sure she was okay with it, which she is not. So, as it stands, I have no car, $300 in limbo, and ONE MILLION new stress units to add to the bipolar gumbo I've got bubbling. And I'm leaving town Thursday, so this all has to be sorted out by then, and if I have a feather's weight extra stress upon me, I may fall into catatonic stupor.
They do not do their financing in house, so I have to take all the specs to my bank (across town, of course) to have them do all the loan paperwork. It is three pm Friday afternoon.
First we go to our local branch, but because it's apparently too much to ask for a bank to do bank stuff, they don't have anyone in who can help me with a loan. (I don't know why I bank here. Any time I need something more complex than a deposit, they are useless and make me go across town to use another branch. I'd leave them, but I bought so many checks...) So we drive to the other branch (across town in a different way, so now we're even further from the dealership), and of course it takes forever to get noticed by someone who can help us, because they're all talking amongst themselves like it's not four pm Friday afternoon and people have shit to do in the hour before the bank closes for the weekend.
We get back to this lady's office. She is not very nice to me; I can feel her judging me hard core. She goes over my financials, tells me my interest rate is going to be over 14% (which is huge, but I'm a delinquent, I guess, and should be punished for my lack of money by being locked into a system that charges me even more money than richer people) and then that even with her punishing me with her interest rate, she has to have my loan okayed by someone else. Look, my credit is not great. I've had some hard times, most of them health related, but I've been working on my credit the past few years, and it's actually improved quite a bit. You work hard, good things happen, right?
WRONG. We have to sit there waiting for twenty minutes while she and this mysterious moneybags decide I am too poor to deserve to better my life. She tells me I have too much student loan debt (which has been deferred since I left SCAD, a deferment that has been approved through 2018, and can simply be extended if I am still not in a position to pay it, and which may go away altogether if I meet certain disability requirements.) Just having the debt means I am too lousy to be trusted with five grand. I am so sorry that I took the trouble to go to grad school and then got really sick while paying off the ridiculously expensive price of education in this country; how hard that must be on YOU.
So I am, of course, crushed, less because I can't get the car than this is just another way I'm inhuman in the eyes of basically everyone, another way being sick is keeping me from living life, another way I'm worthless, a waste of human parts. But my dad's strangely chipper, and he's like, "Look, this is not a huge amount of money, I know you can pay it back, and we lent money to your brother and sister when they bought their cars, so we would be happy to lend you the five grand." This is, of course, amazing and very kind, but it makes me feel even worse, because they've already done so much for me and I am sure that however hard my illness and my current situation is on me, it's worse on them, so I told him I couldn't take their money.
Cut to me feeling like the most worthless creature who has worked hard and been good and mostly just been kicked in the face by it, which was definitely a depression breakdown, but was probably triggered by this whole car thing, so in the morning I tell my dad that if he's really sure they won't need the money, and if my mom is okay with it, yes, I would very much appreciate their help, and I have worked it into my budget that I can pay them back in two years. He said he was thinking of three, but okay, and he would get the money Monday (so he's borrowing from his 401k or something? I didn't ask.)
So, I figure this is settled, and I call the dealership to tell them that the bank wouldn't come through with the loan, but we would pay the whole thing in cash Monday or Tuesday. They can't hold the car, they say, without a deposit, so I give them $300 from my debit account, and it'll just be taken as part of the price when we pay for the car.
Everything's figured, I think, and it is so much stress off that I would be happy were I not a bipolar garbage fire right now.
Then, I'm driving back with my mom after running some errands with her, and she starts talking about how it's a good thing that I didn't get approved for the loan because I shouldn't touch the illegal CD they've set up for me and that I was going to crack open for my down payment (at a loss of 40¢ interest), and that I should just wait until I can afford the new car outright. So, contrary to what I'd been led to believe, my dad in no way addressed any of this with my mom nor made sure she was okay with it, which she is not. So, as it stands, I have no car, $300 in limbo, and ONE MILLION new stress units to add to the bipolar gumbo I've got bubbling. And I'm leaving town Thursday, so this all has to be sorted out by then, and if I have a feather's weight extra stress upon me, I may fall into catatonic stupor.
no subject
Date: 2017-05-01 12:29 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-05-02 02:07 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-05-02 12:10 am (UTC)I just hate it when people don't get perfectly simply concepts.
no subject
Date: 2017-05-02 02:16 am (UTC)Mom: You need to keep the money in your CD. That way you'll have a backup if you need it, and it won't put you over the limit because it's not in your account.
Me: That's illegal.
Mom: How is that illegal?
Me: It's fraud. Misrepresenting your assets and lying to the government about how much money you have is fraud. It's not even the sexy fraud rich people get away with.
Mom: You could just say you gave the money to us for rent or something. And then if you need to use it, we'll just give it back to you...
Me: I'm going to go to jail.
It's very frustrating. I know they're trying to help, but they are blind to the reality that they do not know what they are talking about.
no subject
Date: 2017-05-04 01:40 am (UTC)